The way to perfect charity is arduous...

Delighting in a beautiful sunset the other day when I was working late at the office, I realized how God delights in giving me little joys and consolations...and that I must not purposely seek these little delights because they are not the way to perfect charity...

Strange-sounding you might say? The path to perfection is not self-seeking. I must learn to completely conquer my human tendency for self-love, and this involves a constant struggle against self. Every single day, my natural tendencies are tu nurture self: I brush my teeth, bathe, dress, eat, drink, etc...When tired, I seek to lie down and rest. When in pain, I seek some form of remedy to alleviate or completely take away the pain. In other words, my human reaction to living, is to seek consolation; pleasure instead of pain, and relaxation instead of work.

Who is it that intentionally looks for pain instead of pleasure? Looks for hard work and suffering instead of relaxation and "feeling good"?...

My relationship with a merciful and loving God urges me (yes, urges me) to want to surrender all of myself to His Divine Providence...I am no longer the leader in control of my journey...in fact, I've never been the one "in control of my walk"...My beloved Crucified is my leader from now on. As I gaze upon God's only begotten Son surrendering Himself on the cross for love of little me...I cannot help but cry out in sorrow and joy: "Abba, Father, How great Thou Art!" "Have mercy on me!"